Luke Kwon Is An Asshole And Cost 23 People A Shot At $1,000,000

The Barstool Invitational began today, and I had thoughts of writing an Episode 1 recap blog, but then I was exposed to Luke Kwon, the world's biggest asshole.

The highly anticipated tournament began with all 46 competitors gathering for an introduction, to hear the tournament rules, learn about the rules committee consisting of Dave Portnoy and Big Cat, and participate in a draft to finalize the tournament teams and pairings for day one. The pairings were then announced snake draft style while the matches were decided. This is our first opportunity to meet the world's biggest asshole, Luke Kwon.

"I don't care about PFT," Kwon said of his teammate and pairing for the day 1 scramble in his introductory sentence of the invitational.

As a fan of PFT's and holding bias as a 9x AWL and frequent Macrodoser, I tried to step back and put myself in the unbiased views of a common viewer instead of rushing to immediate judgment of "Hey, this guy's kind of an asshole." Though I'm sure that everyone outside of Luke Kwon's fanbase could probably agree that this guy came off extremely cocky and as a bit of a douchebag with his immediate 'I am better and mightier than thou' attitude.

"You can shank it over and over again. I don't give a shit."

"You can just go do something else. Just not golf."

Now you may be thinking, "Holy fucking shit, I've been aware of this guy for 23 seconds and he's the world's biggest asshole.", but hold on, let's give him a chance, maybe he isn't that bad.

They're clearly having a couple of drinks, just shooting the shit, probably just guys being dudes. Let's see if his play backs up his Shooter McGavin-like arrogance. After all, he did win the Creator Classic; the guy's a stud.

Well, there goes that narrative. Even the biased Luke Kwon crowd has now come to recognize that this guy is an asshole. A shot at $1,000,000, and I wouldn't be able to sleep the night prior, let alone oversleep two alarms, even if I did just have triplets or recently traveled in from Norway. The craziest part is he did the same thing the day before and overslept a tee time for a video with the Bryan brothers.

Now put yourself in his shoes, say you had just overslept your alarms the day prior. Wouldn't you do your best to take every precaution necessary to ensure that wouldn't happen again with $1,000,000 on the line? Alarms every ten minutes, wake-up call, tell your homies to make sure you're up, and maybe not wear your AirPods to sleep.

Doing this after being an asshole, claiming to carry your team to glory without a worry in mind, is adding insult to injury. The punishment that followed was that he couldn't play in the first four holes of the nine-hole scramble. You may say that seems a little steep, a little too severe. To that I'd disagree, there's a million fucking dollars on the line, show a little decorum, respect to your teammates, or at minimum some gratitude for being in that position so many other creators would've killed for. He was lucky Dave ignored the actual rule officials who would've DQ'd him, and instead treated it like a targeting penalty and only suspended him for the first half.

BUT HEY, what if, just what if, he goes out and wins the last 5 holes while PFT and the rest of us watch in awe of his greatness. Let's give him one more chance.

All right, I'm out, fuck this guy.

His first shot flails right, and PFT commenter who possesses a 25 handicap (according to Reddit) throws a dart 5-10 feet inside of him. All of this buildup and douchebagery for this!?

What was once thought of as a guaranteed win for Team Pink turned into one of the greatest displays of being an asshole the internet has seen, and a win for Team Orange. Put this performance right up there with any Jack Doherty clip you've ever seen, and it might hold serve.

It makes no sense to me that he showed no remorse or semblance of condolence throughout the day, even though it was so clear everyone hated his guts in that moment. Ass-chewings from Joey Coldcuts, Bobby Berger, and even a slight from Big Cat, and this guy just walked on with a rye smile like he was the coolest dude at the course.

Day 1 had plenty of highlights like Grant Horvath not knowing Jon Gruden, Andrew Santino's use of "nice little swing", and Dave Portnoy and Ryan Whitney nearly coming to blows over a prosthetic, which has me looking forward to the alternate shot matches in day two. As it stands, it's 8-4 Team Orange, and it feels like the Ryder Cup all over again.

Luke Kwon has a slim shot at redemption and until then, it's forever fuck Luke Kwon in this house; all my homies hate Luke Kwon.

RIP Cody "Beef" Franke