Is it still considered suicide if it’s caused by the NFL Draft?

Today is one of my favorite days of the sports calendar. The NFL DRAFT. It signals to me that the gods have not forsaken me. That no matter how bleak the next few months of the sports calendar seem, Daddy  Football is still here to comfort me. Its also a day where my imagination & delusions can run wild. The things I’ve said out loud over the years, clinging to hope, are WILD in retrospect.

“This is actually a steal… They literally called him Tyreek Hill Jr at Florida”

“Evan Neal might end up being better than Andrew Thomas… good problem to have I guess”

“Did you even watch his Duke film? Peyton Manning said he’s the best QB prospect he’s ever seen ”

Did I say all these things? YES. Did I believe all these things? No… well maybe for a couple minutes. But that’s the beauty of today. You just say shit & try through pure manifestation, grit & desire make it a reality…

“oh this guys incredible… great hip flexibility” 

“Wow I can’t believe he fell to us… I had him higher than Devon Witherspoon on my big board…”

Its SAD….it’s REALLY sad. It’s sad that I put so much stock into these next few days. These kids have no clue how much of my future happiness is relying on them becoming Hall of Famers.

I’m in a bad spot as a Giants fan. I love Daboll & think he’s a great coach but realize if we aren’t good enough this year, then he’s gone. At the same time, I want us to be horrible, so we can draft Arch Manning next year. So basically I’m fucked.

The rumors are currently Daboll wants Jaxson Dart & the GM wants Abdul Carter… you’d think it’s completely possible to get both right? One is undisputedly a top 2 prospect & the other is a 2nd or 3rd rounder… easy peasy.. take Carter at 3 & if you really think you need too, trade back up a few spots back into the 1st n grab Dart. Done. buuuuut…  I remember very clearly when in 2019, we took a 2nd or 3rd round QB in the top 10 of the entire draft, with a great pass rusher still on the board, for no fucking reason, other than to have me on suicide watch. (Insert another Daniel fucking Jones picture here.)

I’m preparing myself for this to happen again. All the same signs. Whisper here… tweet there. I’m fucking horrified. I honestly don’t think I can handle it again. I just watched the Eagles win the Super Bowl, Jayden Daniels is already a top 5 QB in the league…I’m fucking miserable. I’m watching the Draft this year at my buddy’s house. The only reason I’m not tying a noose now to be ready for my inevitable despair, is because I’m genuinely concerned his house would collapse if actually hung myself & he’s got kids upstairs. Otherwise I’d say be worried for me.

So idk… I just had to vent. There really isn’t a point to this blog other than to say that the Draft is great even though it makes me so sad. It’s really just like my college sweetheart… no matter how much I love it, no matter how many hours I spend thinking about it in the shower, no matter how many times her boyfriend cheats on her… she’ll never love me back.