Introducing Our Writers

Secrets out now, some stoolies started a blog with aspirations to write on the real one and grow their followings. What will come of this is unknown, but I believe 5 unique dudes could captivate plenty and piss off the others while learning about themselves through the process. I'd like to take this time to introduce the group I've brought together and teach you a little something you may have not known before.

NAME: JonAnthony Maldanado

ALIAS: Big Twan, Travis, Big Trav, Fake Trav, Bapi, The Boricua Beast

Starting with the most recognizable name on this list, Big Twan. Featured on The Yak multiple times through the search for America's Funniest Travis, Jerry After Dark, when his sister won Feet The Street and for Jerry's Friend Finder, Mook Can't Sleep, and he announced Rough N Rowdy 25's ring girl contest with Large while I sat ringside, concussed.

Twan first came across my radar like most of us that 10x, when he fraudulently submitted a birth certificate with a photoshopped name and won a contest to find the funniest Travis in America. You have to be a sick, twisted, demented, and extremely funny individual to pull that off. I often wonder if his appearance helped him win, but that's a dumbass question because it absolutely did.

This Gabriel Iglesias on vacation-looking mother fucker crushed a guy named Tavis to win the funniest Travis like a Bonds ball into the cove, with no doubt. I am happy to have him aboard and on my side. I say on my side because Twan is a fucking maniac. Rip your throat out and fuck it kind of guy, no joke, seen him do it when he came to watch me get my ass beat in Wheeling. Other than that though, he's pretty chill. I'm excited to see if he can write.

NAME: Derik

ALIAS: Derik from the chat, Ryder, Ryder Reports, BDD

Moving on to the guy I'm most excited to learn about, Derik from The Chat. We recorded a Breakdown with the boys this week (out later today if I have time), and Derik shared what got him into Barstool, a unique story I'll wait for you to listen to or for him to blog himself. Anyway, Derik burst on the stoolie scene with a Mike Green-style BANG.

Derik is known for Rally Rips leading to Hail Marys, Ryder Reports boots on ground for Holy Cross, and letting Smacky Jables know he's a fucking skell. He's a savage that I don't want to cross.

Real quick, behind-the-scenes, tell-all type-a-shit. I was very close to trying to intentionally start a rivalry with Bosco. He denied breakdown multiple times, accused me of having an agenda, and frankly, I think he produces better content when he's got a rival. Then I witnessed Derik tearing down skells left and right and didn't want to put myself in the crosshairs. Shout out to Bosco, I was wrong, the content is still great, I just love the junkyard dog.

NAME: Reed Jones

ALIAS: Goon, RJ, Milf Slayer

Reed is the reason this blog began. He's a stoolie looking to lay down the groundwork and get to the Ship. He challenged himself to write 100 blogs in 100 days because Tate was eviscerating New York blog by blog and Reed wanted to help the cause. He also has a talent for writing and expressing himself which probably were contributing factors.

Reed came to Wheeling for RNR 25 to watch me get slaughtered by the Misfit and I can't say thanks enough. He's a kid that reminds me of myself due to his passion for the stool, his ability to control a crowd (host stoolie Wednesday), and his love for piping milfs. In Wheeling, Reed left the group to take two motherly women back to his hotel and hasn't spilled a detail. RESPECT KING.

I was going to write about Frankie and me but you know how much we love to blow Barstool. I just hope this inspires more creativity from each of us, I know it's in there. VIVA